Tuesday, June 28, 2005
No prepaired for this at all! Seemed like a good idea to do the hole single thing and living on my own....I dont know weather I can do it!

Being here is fine, having my own place...cool! Should I be doing it, I dont really know! I have to get into work and do so much stuff just to live and survive! If I was not ill it would be fine! But because I am ill....its so much harder!

Its a rollercoaster of e-motions, something goes well and I am over the moon! Something goes bad and I just want a cuddle! I am no longer the man I used to be! Iam just being honest! You have ms and your pretty f*cked! Mobility and every thing is going to go! The need to find someone is increased...Do I have the right or balls to place this on anyone else! No... Pick yourself up and get on with it while you can! Sorry not being very upbeat but I think you have to be prepaired for that too! We all die at the end...its how you live your life that makes you a man...or the real person your suposed to be! I have to get from one day to the next and be happy!
Emotions...can live with them...cant live without them!

I need some sex!Alot of sex!....ok I need a holiday!
I will be happy one day.....honest!

posted by personallog! @ 10:00 pm  
  • At 11:01 am, Blogger pocketpunk said…

    ok - lets get a plan in order. You need to talk to work about your future. You need to talk to your consultant about how the disease is progressing. Get your ass to citizens advice or benefits dudes and find out what your are entitled to. Gather up all the information and then decide what your next "step" is. I dont think u belong in Manc anymore mate. Its got too many memories of your past and you want to start a fresh one. You need to be closer to the mother ship whilst your are still an MS newbie. Remember to give yourself a break here. You've only been diagnosed 7 months.

  • At 12:57 pm, Blogger mdmhvonpa said…

    Dude, you need company. A roomie or something.

  • At 2:59 pm, Blogger personallog! said…

    both good comments! Do I really want to get of here! Do I want to give up.....? The "mothership" is a good idea!(apart from mother buying my clothes) I have money coming in from my job and the only real down side is the quiet lonleyness! Just me and ms! need some time to think this through!

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Name: personallog!
Home: St. Annes, Lancashire, United Kingdom
About Me:
I am 6ft 3" skinny and not well. I was diagnosed with ms in 2004 and I would like to speak with others who have ms. I have a want to raise money for ms charities. We have to find a cure for this hell!!!! See my complete profile

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