Wednesday, April 19, 2006
So tired! I need my bed!
I haven't been at work for a week and I really am liking my flat. Me and Jen are getting on better and I know what I want to aim for again....ish! I know I have got some thinking to do to get my head on straight again. If I am honest I know its not working in Manchester without some support. I cant exactly ring people to help me if I fall in the street and that worries me. I am strong in will but when my body fails me I need to feel secure enough to ring someone who isn't an hour away by car to get to me. Its sensible isn't it? I have friends here but have not talked to many of them for some time...They have not contacted me! Some haven't even seen my new flat!!!

Ok I don't blame them for me falling in the street, but I know I cant rely on them(that's the scary thing!)....I know I could with my family. I have a few months here to sort something out before I even consider getting things ready to make a move(the Jump being just 1 of them!). But I have to look at the bigger picture don't I? I am starting to look for a job now. Re-trainig maybe needed but I think I have proved myself by surviving here on my own for this long. There comes a time when you have to say I have taken enough of people deserting me and I need some security. I will be fighting all the time with this disease and I do need some help....even if it is just a small thing. I know I can't do it on my own anymore.

Maybe is just depression talking and maybe I will be fine tomorrow but.....I need someone with me for these days. Sorry for bringing my usual upbeat feeling down but I am honest here as I have always been and I should be honest with myself too!

Tomorrow is another day. I hope you are all well
posted by personallog! @ 6:38 pm  
  • At 2:23 am, Blogger amanda said…

    oh Dave a good CLOSE support system is definetly needed for anyone like us. You have a lot of the emotional support system but physical on some days is just as if not even more so important.

    I'm glad that you seem to be in a lil more of a cheerful, normal kinda Dave mode.
    Love ya~Me~

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Name: personallog!
Home: St. Annes, Lancashire, United Kingdom
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I am 6ft 3" skinny and not well. I was diagnosed with ms in 2004 and I would like to speak with others who have ms. I have a want to raise money for ms charities. We have to find a cure for this hell!!!! See my complete profile

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