Sunday, February 26, 2006
Hiccups gone!
There seems to be some head messed up stuff gone on instead! I got rid of the hiccups by relaxing...meditation type stuff. I think having my head up my bum about my girl caused it! I love Jen with all my heart, all my soul, everything in my essence and it scares me! I have seen her today and there is one track that I think is close to describing how I feel!

Dont shake it off because of the name of the band!

Nine Inch Nails:Le Mer

Its a beautifull track that has been on here before when I started puting film reviews on here! It was an advert for a movie and I cant find it! Anyone remember the name of the film? When she left today my heart was wrenched out! What right do I have to put this disease on anyone else? I know I am going to find it harder in the future and I dont want to cause any upset with someone who means so much to me! Maybe its a life thing I dont know. I have come to terms with the fact that I am going to die! Everybody dies in the end...no matter who you are! Yeah its what you do when your here that counts....but I hate the fact that I am going to be like this for the rest of my life.... Its not fair! Its shit! She diserves so much fucking more than me like this!

This disease doesnt suck it doesnt have the right to be anything more than shit!

The brave face of Dave has been cracked! Broken by love for Jen! I thought I was hard in the face of this disease but its killing me! This is the first time I have cried while doing this blog....but now I am angry and I shouldnt be when I have just had an amazing weekend with her. I should be happier than ever!

Dave
posted by personallog! @ 7:04 pm  
4 Comments:
  • At 1:45 pm, Anonymous Shannon said…

    It is rough, Dave. I'm single and have all the same thoughts. So, here we go. 1) If Jen got MS, would you head for the hills? I didn't think so. 2) Yes, something awful may happen to you, but someone completely healhty could die in a car accident (happens every day). Life is too random to worry about what might be. They could cure it next year, month, week. Who knows? You make yourself crazy with thoughts like that Keep your head up! She's a big girl and can make decisions for herself, and she decided to be with you.

    Smile :)

     
  • At 3:20 pm, Anonymous some_maineiac said…

    dave, I couldn't agree more with your thoughts that we all must die and it's what we do while we're here that counts...in the words of the immortal Jim Morrison..."the future's uncertain and the end is always near, let it roll, baby, roll"

    perhaps (if you're really good) you'll be re-incarnated as a healthy, manly stud, with that 6 ft. cock you mention below and you can pleasure your cosmic mate with it all night long!!!

    and your friend above makes a very good point...if it was Jen with ms, I also do not think you would leave her by the wayside...

     
  • At 4:55 pm, Blogger personallog! said…

    Sorry guys! I know 'stop being crap Dave!!' I know! Thanks for your input! And Shannon your single....no f**ing way your beautifull I have seen your pic! GRRRAAARRR! hehe! Your right I would not leave Jen if she had it and I have no plans on leaving her ever....if she wants to be with me I will stay! I love her!
    Thanks guys feeling bad finished!
    Dave

     
  • At 3:33 am, Blogger amanda said…

    hey Dave I know I'm a lil late here with my 2cents but I'm putting them in anyway..

    I understand how you can feel that way as I think we all do on some days MS or not. I was terrified of losing my husband right after my diagnoses...we weren't even married a year yet when it happened..

    But look at us now it has been almost 6 years married and the 28th of this month will be 5 years living with this and all the time him by my side. chin up good things happen to good people and u DAve are good people!!!

    Love ya take care..Amanda

     
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Name: personallog!
Home: St. Annes, Lancashire, United Kingdom
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I am 6ft 3" skinny and not well. I was diagnosed with ms in 2004 and I would like to speak with others who have ms. I have a want to raise money for ms charities. We have to find a cure for this hell!!!! See my complete profile

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