Wednesday, August 31, 2005
you wont believe this!
got to hospital kacking my pants expecting the nassea to return today! Really worried and almost in tears before I left home! Got there and imput the drip into my arm...took some blood! did some testing! Made me walk for 250 meters without stick! then came back after 3 hours!(I was sick as a chip by this time,feeling sick without getting any drugs!) They sent a blond(geordie to make me feel good!) and said...
"sorry,we dont have enough mitroxatone for you David!" ....

"Can you come back on friday? You seem to be able to take this drug and you will have one more before we change it to copaxone"

So I have to go back this friday and take it then! I feel sick now! Disaster! Just being in hospital makes me feel sick! I dont think I could do another trip! The stress is bad enough!

I will do it! The nero said something that me smile tho!
" You seem to be getting better everytime I see you!"

What! Then why do I feel worse!

En route home I got taxi driver to stop at a off licence so I could get some beer!


Roll on friday then! That is so going to mess up the weekend!

posted by personallog! @ 3:22 pm   2 comments
shitting my pants!!!!!
hospital today! Yet again! Not looking forward to it either! The relisation that I am on my own....its paramount on days like this!

lh and pocket punk:south of france
Mates: In what seems like another planet!

Oh God why me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Right Music before hospital:Timo Mass:Numb

Feel alot better about it now........I will do another update after!

posted by personallog! @ 6:05 am   0 comments
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
25000,000 we need to start talking bout this!
2 and 1/2 million people globally with ms!

Its rising every day! Great thought for the down side of my quarter! going to hospital in the morning and my legs are burning 1 minute then freezing the next! As you may amagine I am not going to work today! We should be talking about this.....shouldnt we?

Good weekend aside! I am not happy with not getting to work! I have so much to prove! I will go out today! Going to the docs to get pain killers!

Right good points now then:

Good music for the day:
Nitin Sawheney: The Conference
Nizlopi: Half these songs are about you
Timo Maas:Numb (My tune for the Month!!!)"the pain is mild todayyyy, I would do anything to numb youuuu!" "the pain will not kill you" what a tune!
Somthing dirty(vix will love this!) Have signed up on adult friend there are some sexaul depressed people who feel the need to crack one off to there webcam! I am a man and will watch!lol Keep it coming girls!

At least it made you smile!

Have a good day!
posted by personallog! @ 8:06 am   3 comments
Monday, August 29, 2005
Dirty Weekend!
Good music
Good company
I didnt have to move once unless the call of nature came! Lots of alcohol was drunk! People dancing in the frount room! Great weekend! Now the recovery time.....I have to go to hospital this week too!

Tunes of the weekend:

Hernan Catteneo!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What a man! the real disks of steel!
Timo mass Boomshanka!
posted by personallog! @ 9:33 am   3 comments
Saturday, August 27, 2005
music again.....having a top time....getting drunk and listening to good tunes!
John B & Lyby Pickering: Electro freek(drum and base masters!!!!!!!!!!)

Having a top time!
posted by personallog! @ 3:26 pm   1 comments
Friday, August 26, 2005
Happpy but ill,do you know why?(gold coast reveiw!)
its raining outside!
My legs are hurting!
I have reported sick to work!
but.....I have cigarettes....great tunes (Nizlopi at the mo!Live!) and its coming to the weekend! Its friday people! I have my best mates coming tonight! Beer night tonight! Life is too short to be upset or depressed! Its raining outside but I am happy indoors/inside! I dont know why I am happy but I like it! The scarey thing is I think I am begining to love life again! Watch out girls here I come!lol

I am probley going to feel bad with a hangover tomorrow but thats tomorrow! If you can get up and go so! If you can sing...sing out! Live the life you want when you can! And be happy! Its pretty cool! Honest!

Possibility of emotional incontance maybe? Check out the podcast:
Or Kims podcast at the side>>>>>>

Just read through the Gold Coast Cure! watch the dvd again! And I need some convincing! Yes the diet and exercise make sence! Yes we should look after our diets! The yoga tecnique will strenghen your body and help with mobility issues(if you can do them in the first place!) But is it really a cure? If the dvd had Ivy doing the excersises and I could see how bad she was before the program then yes I would jump into it!(jump maybe the wrong word! This is my view alone and would support anyone trying it! I have just worked out how much it would cost me to do this and do I really need to buy all the new oils? I like my food and beer! I think I have to do more with my life! I think enjoying life is the biggest cure! Please do buy the book and look over it! Even try it! There is nothing more that I want than to get everyone a cure for this dambed disease! I think this book will help but without enjoying your life in the first place.....please make your own choice! It could do you some good! I have changed my diet beause of the good teachings here (thankyou)but I am sorry you cant make me give up beer! I dont need to loose weight(I am loosing wieght and muscle)! I need to get better not feel better about being dieased! I do that allready! Please make sure you read it tho! Its a good idea! If I had a partner to help me with this I would do it all! I live on my own and the excersise would knack me! I would loose weight from not being able to cook for myself!

Hope you all reveiw it your selves and that you are well!
posted by personallog! @ 8:38 am   2 comments
Thursday, August 25, 2005
8 hours no was hell
just got delivery from shopping centre! Internet is blessed! Got all the health food I need to start the diet plan from the US! I will give you a break down later in the week! right now I am going to smoke, drink and smoke! arrrr ciggerettes are from the heavens! Wow! I need to skin up now! Lol!

Welcome new starters check last update for: almodiva

thanks for the input! and good luck with your blog! You can do it!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh this beer is the best!

posted by personallog! @ 8:14 pm   0 comments
break on through to other side!

The doors saved my life! I never thought I'd say that out loud before! Another day for pain! Rang into work and got no reply on the phone! Well it was before 9, never mind that it is a 24 hour call centre! Feel really bad, legs killing me! Run out of ciggys and next delivery in 5 hours! I put the best of the Doors on! Cleaned the flat and took the rubbish out and then it got to the track above! Break on through pain
for a minute! Isnt that a bitch!

Then "light my fire" and I set about my ash tray! I havent done this since collage! Got all the butts and hand rolled the most doggy ciggy from the butts! Lit it and nearly cryed! errrggg! By the time "Spanish Caravan" came on I was ready to go out in the rain and make the jorney to the shops to buy some real ciggeretts! Break through the pain barrier to the shops I think for me! "Strange Days!"!

Its only 5 hours without a cig, Chemical addiction is so I want to quit? Errr no! "when the musics over turn of the lights!" and not before! Roll another and take it Dave! I could ring sinead...err no! I could knock on next door and ask to buy one from them....err no! Do I know anyone who's not at work...err no!

Time for the blues! road houses blues! Bite the bullet....just roll another one, smoke it! Then die of shame! You scumbag Dave! There all my butts in the try! Doesnt make me feel any better tho! Right next time I get a delivery from the shops I am going to get some more than my usual order! Or maybe get some gum to quit yeah! this battle is going to go on for years! Its easier than fighting ms tho aint it? Just got to wait it out!

Arrrgggg!!!!!!"Break on through to the other side"
Personal battles are the worst!

Hope your all dealing with your personal battle better than me!

"The End!"lol
posted by personallog! @ 8:14 am   5 comments
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Emma the chess mistress!
I have found some I can relate too, Em and myself are the only two young people with walking sticks at work and the stories we can tell each other are very simlar! Tough break up once the doc's worked what was wrong with us, the loss of friends due to having a stick..bla bla bla! You all know my story so I wont do it short hand for you here!
She is an intelegent beutiful woman.....there is a lot of you out there! We can deal with the injustice of being young with a stick by talking together! A good friend I think! and she plays a damb fine game of chess too! Up really late(what is it with women who want a man all night long?) talking through pc mic's! Just like being on the phone but you dont have to pay for it!(internet charges aside!) It was just good to talk about....anything with someone who knows! You will get to hear about her somemore in future I have a feeling she is a friend who is true! I seem to have the knack of finding them! hello all! You guys reading this are testment to true friends!

I think ms is giving me the ability to see through people who are false! I dont have time for the bitchyness with the regular,able bodied, time wasters! People who dont want to spend time finding about the real me and just see the stick will have it shoved up there nose(I corrected this statement 5 times to get it right,my mum reads this after all!lol)

If anything,ms has slowed me down yes, but its making me the person I am supposed to be! Hope you like it coz I am not changing!

Phoned in sick today! I am going to have to watch this staying up late with women!
Track of the day: Nirvana:dumb
Hope you all ok
posted by personallog! @ 10:49 am   3 comments
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
full day....well so close!
5 mins off a full day! I have loads to report....but the beer thing is calling!

right ready!
Got the last of my lost cd's through the post! I say last....what I mean is I have replaced the last of lost cd's....lost under Sineads foot to be precise! We had a fight some five years ago and she came into the house and starting smashing them up! About £50.00 of lost music!....and I wonder even more why we got back together then! Thats history! Dont think baddly of her I was a paraniod mess back then!(may have had somthing to do with her who knows!) Got back catologue of Nirvana!

I have some things to do now! Rember Em? We have work out somthing commen apart from the walking sticks! We both like chess! We have met up a couple of times on msn just to play! Last night....up till 0:30 playing the game of kings! Its great to find an out let for us both! She is the queen of chess I think! We are equally the game you see!

Still no text from Jen yet...well she didnt want me to pay for it!God bless her! Missing you babe!

I am going to get a exercise bike and work out 3 times a week till I can fathom the diet from Dr Larson(Gold coast cure) Its a cost thing I think! The exercises should be fine...Yoga moves I have been told! But to prepair me for them I think a week on cycling should get me up and...errr..running! I want to get fit so my body can take the kicking! Well if I can get my good day better and continue the confident Dave then maybe this will work! Watch this space!

Really good news!I got my bonus from work! Yey! I think its for being there! I want a bigger one here! Here is to the next one!(fingers crossed)

Music:Nirvana:Smells like teen spirt!

Hope your all ok
posted by personallog! @ 4:29 pm   2 comments
Monday, August 22, 2005
start of a new week...starting very slowly!
Great music this weekend...but all good thing come to an end! I spent sunday at the family house and there has been many great conversations with mam and dad! It was very hot! I was fine in the morning before the weather heated up! I was even thinking that I have ms covered! I was walking without aid! I had a smile from ear to ear! Then the sun came out! Started to wobble when walking. I could not hold anything in my hands for more than 3 minutes and sitting down was unconfortable.

This morning....well at 04:30 I awoke in a sweat had just had a nightmare! I havent had one for about a year and a half! This was wierd! It was about Sinead...I do hope she is ok! I woke up in a strange bed not knowing where I was...was perfectly ok! Went back to sleep...had a dream about another woman, dont know who this was but she was 'Fine'! I woke up again at about 06:45 I was dripping in was raining outside very heavly! I quickly put a t-shirt and a pair of jeans! I went downstairs and out into the rain...without stick! I held my hands out to the sides with palms facing the sky and looked up into the rain! It was fantastic! I got soaked in rain but the feeling of rain on the skin was amazing!(I havent been out in the rain like this since I moved into my own flat!) It cooled me down and I felt stress leaving the body and I didnt fall over! Hard to explaine what happened but I have had a smile on my face all day so far! I am in pain and my legs hurt so much but I still have the smile! I phoned in sick today....its only the body that is sick this time tho! I think I migh try and contact Sinead but only to make sure she is ok! I am jealose of her trip to Goa but I think I am making the best plan not to go as it will be too hot for me now!

Never say never! I think I have to focus on somewhere else! I hear Alaska is beutiful and cold too! Any idea's for a holiday?

Hope you all ok
P.s: 1 week to go till smurf blood hospital visit (31st of this month!)
posted by personallog! @ 9:04 am   4 comments
Saturday, August 20, 2005
Old and new!
tunes all last night.....

Blind Melon
Kula Shaker
Nitan Swahney
Rage Against the Machine
Led Zepplin
More Doors
More Beatles
Brandon Block
Alex P
Diesle boy
Pink Floyd
Nightmares on wax
The Who!!!

Too much to drink and too much to smoke! But good time had by all!Lol and its only friday! Remeber to have a good time aswell!
Messed up
posted by personallog! @ 8:53 am   1 comments
Friday, August 19, 2005
2nd update today....why...

I got a letter through the post saying to pick up a delivery from the post office! It turned out to be the xmas pressie for a family member!(Not telling you who or what as they read this too! Thats not the bit I want to say tho! I got on the bus to go down the street one stop as sore legs stop me from walking anywhere far! At the bus stop there was a young lady...I smiled! She smiled and we got talking....just about general stuff really! "How you doing" ect! She asked me what leg bone I snapped and I told her about ms ect.. she said "arrr" then then she said somthing which I think disevered the mention of a second update:

"Its allways the good looking ones init!"

Did it make you feel any better? then try this:

"you have such a good aura arround you!"

Shame she was old enough to be my mum! Lol

Got mates coming round tonight and going away for the weekend... Drink and be merry!


p.s The pic is the view from my window! Monkey puzzle tree giving good aura!
p.s.s Music of the moment:The beatles:Somthing! (not the most popular but a great tune!
posted by personallog! @ 11:37 am   3 comments
Legs hurt today and causing wierd thoughts!
I am off today because my legs hurt! Need a pain killer or a couple of beers. I have sent a text to Jen asking her to design me a tatoo (She is the artist)! Well it could be my 'doing something amazing' idea for the week! Got money to do it so why not?

I have never done somthing like that ever...It would be something to ID my body if anything were to happen to me(it wont dont worry!) why not! I have asked for somthing celtic and no symbols that mean something else! Like symbols that stand for somthing in another language....the last thing I wont to do is offend or make myself look stupid! No Japanese or Chinese symbols that could be....pie an chips from a menue!(eh Sinead!No hers means beutiful and she is, wink*!)

I want somthing cool! That will look cool on an old man...why I am older! I will put a pic on here if/when I get it done! Any designs emailed to me will be concidered! Be nice with then please! I think on my arm or somewhere that can be hidden....I still want to give the impression that I am human! Please help as it will be for the rest of my life! No facial tatoo's like from Voyager!

Strange thoughts....but if I am going to be in pain anyway why not make it decorative! Lol


Music today....chilled Radiohead:ok computer

It now reminds me of Jen and her staying over! What a night! Good thought for this album now. I told you I would shake the bad thoughts off it!
posted by personallog! @ 9:03 am   0 comments
Thursday, August 18, 2005
What was today about?

I have been to see a doctor today! I have seen the occupational health doctor for returning to work! I thought this would a great oppertunity to show that I am human! It was so funny! I went in and stumbled into the waiting introduced himself and I looked pitifull! Then he asked me whats wrong! So I told him about every aspect of the damed disease....then I smiled!
I told him about the blog and what I have acomplished since my break up with Sinead! I told him about changing my diet beause a doctor in the states wants me to review his book/diet/exersise program! Then I bought on the confidence thing and getting the nero to change his diagnosis! I told him about my plans to learn about websight design and create a website for ms survivors! Then before I left I said "I want to compleatly change the diaognosis to...I have a bit of a cold! I need my job to support me further till I shake this!" The doc nealy died laughing!

I got the idea for website design from Camile(who I spoke to for about an hour through Aol messenger! I made her laugh...she made me laugh a lot. I felt it did us both good to be talking to each other! Watch this space when I have the website design! I want to! Ideas will be excepted! What do we need? When do we want it....what colour it should be! Where should I look for funding! Lets do somthing amazing! Lets do it now! I am hype up about this! Do let them tell you its time for death! Let us make the desistion! Dont lie down and take it! Lie down when 'you' want to! Fight for your right to be!

Saying that I had a half day at work.....coz it hurt and it was my choice to come home!
Not giving up on this! Give me idea and lets see what we can do!


Todays music!Lots of crazy dance!
And have you herd of Blind melon? Rock!!!
posted by personallog! @ 2:58 pm   0 comments
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
doom is allways rife!
Half day! Absolute....poo! Managed to pick a memory card for the camera! Guess what, It doesnt work!!!!!!!!!! Gave the company a call ready to kick off....then I thought I have just been taking the wrap at work why should I pass it on! Whole Karma thing made me stop! Well karma and the crap hold music! They are going to give me a new one on friday...through the post!

I have calmed down and started to listen to MY tunes!
John B:Blue eye shadow (Bass line of the gods!)

Just got a text from Jen and she is running out of credit so only getting 6 more before the money runs out! I offered to get her some more but she hasnt got back to me! I think I have to speak to her some more! I was up late last night playing chess over the internet with Emma! Top bird!

Its so warm today, I think thats what has caused me to come home in a foul mood! If i spend one more day in the buff I think I will become nudist! Oh and dont webcam chat with me on a hot day! Not as pretty when I am a sweaty mess! Going to "chill" in frount of the telly for a couple of hours!

Had a wierd dream last night....I had a dream about Sinead again! Hope she is ok!
Just a sub line to todays update: I have started to read the book I watched the exercises....I was smoking and drinking beer at the time....all I could think was "No Wounder Dave!" With my experence of diets I all ways look for roast lamb recipe...and to my surprize it sounds great....If I cant eat the lamb one I usually stop there! I think I will start it after I have finished all the beer in the house... next week if i dont buy more hehe! I let you know the effects as soon as I feel them!

Music today is deffinatly a Drum and bass day for me! Angry!

Hope your day is better
posted by personallog! @ 1:54 pm   2 comments
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
everything you need through the post?
Mass exodus through the mail today!
1.Somthing to listen too:
iii.+All in my head
2.Somthing to look at:
i.Picture from Jen(wow and smells great too! xxxx)
ii.Digital Camera(Samsung 6 million mega pixels(no batteries or memory card!!!)
iii.Book from Dr Andrew Larson:The Gold Coast 5 week diet and exersise plan with dvd! I let you know with this one...its only 5 weeks to cure disease!

And all when I feel bad and not at work! Last night was the podcast! I havent left the house for 2 days...I dont need comes through the post! Just need Jen shirnked wrapped and posted to me now!lol
Just dvd for the book Gold coast cure! woah this is going to be hard! I will give a clear update later in the week! I think I have to throw all my food away sh*t!

posted by personallog! @ 11:34 am   0 comments
Well I have done it and have embarised myself in multipul countries around the world! Remember the rule mentioned a couple of days ago! Do something that scares you at least once a week!
Kim and Tod have supplied the medium use it! Even if you feel bad, you can do it! I have! I am going through a bad patch at the moment! Called in sick today too! Pain in legs is driving me nutts! I have got some good news tho(apart from the podcast!) I recieved some mail from Jen. She has given me some art work to put on my wall! Cool art work babe! Scarey but cool! I will ask if I can put it up here but I dont think she will like it!

Remember to check out the pod cast:

Hope everyone is better than me at the mo!

Oh music:
Paul Weller:Wild wood!
posted by personallog! @ 7:40 am   0 comments
Monday, August 15, 2005
errr you want to here my voice? Stage fright
I have just finished my edition to the ms podcast! I think you wont believe my accent! Be nice Kim and Tod!

Now I have done it....I would like to do more!

Fame at last and no dancing required!

P.s still off work!
posted by personallog! @ 8:34 pm   0 comments
Damb cricket
good intentions to go to work today....but....the cricket is on at manchester and the fans are getting the tram into town! No space to get on and I had to sit and wait for an hour! Legs were ok before but now! I think the expression is "its just not cricket baby!" so back to the flat for day of pain! Death metal I think:

36 crazy fists! Good album very hard and some great tunes on it! Not exactly death metal but very angry in bits! Very apt!

I ironed a shirt and everything! No amount of PMA will cover that one! Hate the fact that I was determined to get a full week done before the 31st!(blue day ahead!) Well there is time yet! Must get the single mans guide started for ms'ers! To be finished before I put it on here!

Please make sure you listen to Kim and Tods podcast! Very interesting:
Thankyou for giving us a voice! Very proud of you! Thanks for mention and I hope I dont get vertigo among other stuff!

Hope you have a good week!
posted by personallog! @ 8:19 am   2 comments
Sunday, August 14, 2005
mario picato!!!!
hypnobounce whoa!

the album :lizard man! what a DJ
chair dancing sunday! just say fouk! Saulty!

good lad!
posted by personallog! @ 2:05 pm   0 comments
Sunday moring wake up call!
A wake up call from God! Well people going to church anyway! Woke up at 09:00 with noise of people in next flat getting ready! Only one remedy for this:

Kosheen:Catch (Drum and base masters!)

Got my washing in the sink and ready to be spinned dry....yes I need a new flat and washing machine! need to get this done by lunch time as the boys are coming back today. They will be popping in on the way back to thier houses! I know it will be a drinking and smoking pot day for me! More Kosheen! Got to get the sleep thing sorted again just so I can get to work as a regular thing! Just need to fund all the social events coming up! Its a drag being in demand!lol!

Had a wierd dream last night: In a night club and had my stick with me, people dancing, drum beat hard(hard house I think) and I was hiding from.....Sinead! Not much else just a good feeling of night life! I told you it was weird! The only reason I mention this is that my dreams recently have an uncanny knack or coming true! Or at least they predict whats going to happen!
Messed up! I think it must be a smoking to much or somthing! Freaky stuff finished....sorry! If you have had this let me know please because it worring me!

Hope your all ok
posted by personallog! @ 9:09 am   0 comments
Saturday, August 13, 2005
A Friend is coming to stay over again!
Jen is coming over again in 5 weeks time. Cant wait! She is a good friend and really like spending time with her.

Just finished watching 24 series 4 and still gob smacked! What a show! I really want to start my learning...computers! Big motivator Jack Bower kicking some ass and his character is great! I want to say more but I don't want to spoil the show for people who haven't seen it! Legs hurting again and I am really tired(might have something to do with staying up all night and watching the show!) so I want to get into bed soon!

2 weeks and 3 days to go till my next visit to hospital! Oh joy!

Keep smiling people...Its infectious!
posted by personallog! @ 12:33 pm   0 comments
Friday, August 12, 2005
Michell bought me a drink whoo!
Hello all, Another tip!

Be yourself and dont lie to you! Anyone who lies to you...get rid! I was bought a bottle of rioja today by the beutifull Michelle....she looked at me in a bad bad mood! I went outside for a ciggy and was talking about a buying beer on the way home and how much trouble it will be to carry a crate home! Told someone else that wine would be light wieght and easy to carry, I mentioned rioja once! Later in the day.......she turns up with a bottle for me! I offered money but she said "no its yours!" So I am going to drink it with a smile!

When I was coming home...spoke to a young lady that I trained to the job we do! Got complements from her and talked all the way home....not telling anything about her! Just that she is LLLLOOOOVVVLLLLEEEEY! Well I have 24 to watch this weekend and I Have a eye appointment on saturday! Staying in MY own flat for most of the weekend....why....coz its mine!

Tune for the day: Cheech:Rocksteady (Dance Great bass sample and deffo makes me want to go clubbing soon and shake my ass!Having it large!)

Have a good weekend and stay confident...remeber PMA!
posted by personallog! @ 4:59 pm   0 comments
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Well....which would you choose?
An infected person or somone you have been going out with for 7 years? Dont blame her!

Do you really? Still mates! Must havent have been that good as I guessd! Oh well whos next? Em at work is being really not really! Time to get drunk!

Still happy!

Remeber what I said about Sinead....better off without the sorrow from me! No comments on this one I am a stronger person now! Hope it happens all the time to be honest I could do with more mates like her(Jen I mean!)!
posted by personallog! @ 6:56 pm   2 comments
Half day at work....what again..surprise surprize!
Well at least I have 24 season 4 to watch! no beer in fridge tho...bummer!

Legs hurting and its getting right up my nose! I have been thinking about the hospital at the end of the month and of course what happens! Think of somthing bad and it happens! Wish it worked the other way round to! If it did I would be having more sex thats for sure! Hmmm More music....think of clubbing and it shall be little grasshoper!

That being the case:
Faithless:God is a Dj (tune! hands in the air like you just dont care! This is my church!)

So tired....but you all know that too yeah! Time for 24! Oh and no more batman jokes you two!

Take care

posted by personallog! @ 12:46 pm   0 comments
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Right who the f*ck has a holly bush round there house?
Stumbled and grabbed the wall on route home from work(Another full 9-5 shify Yey!) Hand full of holly to the groung! Cut my hand and it knacks! Ok its a deco thing but at least cut it back a bit!

Right good news today! Got 24 series 4 today through the post and going to be watching it this weekend! Got some music too!

Do me bad they are cool! They can play music and the photo's look great! have a look:

There is no music snippets but trust me they are great! The single: Time for is top! Would love to see them live! They have a gig in manchester in october if anyone is interseted! I will be the mad man dancing with a stick! (non glow stick!) Why change Dave?

Well I have cooled down a bit...(not really true now I have some more good tunes!)
Mid secion round my stomach is painfull,I think I am walking funny with stick! Still happy tho! I made up a tune when it gets bad! its just"Jen Jen Jen Jen Jen Jen Jen"

Repeate to the rythm of your works for me!Lol

Hope everyone is ok!
posted by personallog! @ 5:07 pm   4 comments
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
New symptom...Well for me!
How hot can one body get! No not Jen this time....Me! Sweating loads and the only cool liquid in the fridge is beer! (Maybe not a bad thing!) I am going to work tomorrow no matter how sweaty I get! I have an appointment with occupational health! They have got a doctor in this time! Like he is going to tell me a cure or something, or I don't have ms! Yeah right! Going to chill out and watch TV for a hour before going to bed! Any tips anyone?

posted by personallog! @ 8:31 pm   0 comments
Half day at work....*t!

Legs in pain! God damb it!


*****Got a star Email (Kim and Hubby!) asking me to advertise a website for ms sufferers check this out:******** Its fantastic toi hear the voice of a fellow suffer/surviver! Keep up the great work you two! Made my day!
posted by personallog! @ 12:03 pm   1 comments
Monday, August 08, 2005
Watched it!
hmm, Henny Saunders had ms for 20 years and is currently loosing mobilty! She wanted Paul to help her get too her daughters Wedding....It reminded the viewer that there is no cure yet! Henny showed a real want to see the wedding abroad! Very possitive in thought!

So what did he do! He called in a Bio Energy Tecnician(Sacka)! A "what" I here you say!
Apperntly the BAT was chanelling the enrgies of Henny and this process was also combined with hypnosis! The result were seen to be allmost instant! She waved her hands over Henny and was touching in various points on her body! Henny Had a white face before these session and was red after! Henny could walk with slow stumble further after the treatment. The treatment lasted for about 2 weeks of intensive Hand waving! Henny was very pleased with what she accomplished. I wish her and her family the best of luck! I felt rather down after the show as I was hoping for more!

I think I will feel like this every time I see a possible help/cure and find a black hole! I think seeing another ms'er dealing with her demon eye opening! I know I wont walk up tomorrow and 'they' announce a cure! I think now I know what the 'Look' everyone gives me means! They feel sorry for me!

I am going to break that look and get a cure....or die trying! I think I have relise a couple of things! I/we are going to die and so does everyone! Its what you do while your here that counts! I dont want to build up my expectations! I want to have a life worth living! Need a pick me up,a cuddle and a sleep in bed smelling nothing but Jennys perfume!(she sprayed my pillow which is helping me sleep!)

Maybe looking in to alternative therapy will aid my life but not cure me! But any benifit is a good thing! I know cod liver oil and ginko bilboa has helped me! May need to look into the Bio Energy thing! What is everyone else doing? Tell me! Hope this diet and exercise book gets here soon!

Realising life worth and the want to see Jen more! (Get a theme tune Dave!)

posted by personallog! @ 9:00 pm   0 comments
tonight is the Paul Mckenner thing!
This update is done before 9 and I have my fingers cross to see the results he can get! This is going to be a long one so get yourself a beer and get comfortable!

I think the weekend was brill! I have been into work today from 9 till 17:00! Thats a full days work! Jen is a star! she has awaked me to life! You can be happy Just smile and get on with it! No one else is going to make you happy get out there and do it! Find that special person and love them through and through! I have a new view on life today! No one is taking it from me without a fight!I think its helped me not to talk to the only contact she is getting from me is through this blog! Sorry mate but no more looking back!
I bought Jen a wont make sence without knowing the conversation I had with her about old cinema productions! I bought her a dvd of the 1st version of Moulin rouge! Ok no dissing it untill you have seen it! She drew me a picture which coming through the post! Cant wait to see it and I am not putting on here untill its been on my wall!(personal picture as I have nothing on the walls in my flat!) Budding artist so cant wait! I just know its great just coz its from her! The best present she gave me was to spay her perfume on my pillow with her perfume...8 hours perfect sleep!

Had a hard day today! I wont bore you with the little bits,Got the disabled chair on tram by asking for it politley....ect.

Been smiling all today and cant get rid of it! Its annoying me now! Got cds in the post...Elliot Smith....hole back catolog! Really really good! Very impressed! Shame about him passing away as would love to here more(he was very emotional man!)

*****Got a star Email (Kim and Mate!) asking me to advertise a website for ms sufferers check this out:********

Lots of info for us! Just turn the speakers on before you start surfing on it! Good call Kim! Remember we have a vioce so use it however we can!

Going to wash a shirt for tomorrow now I will do the Paul Mckenner update tomorrow! Hope he is curing more than giving up smoking! Go On Paul!

Forgot to mention....its Damb hot in Manchester and its playing hell with my feet! Got a beer now and a Happy Face! Cant wait to see Jen again! What a star!

Forgot...tune of the day:
Elliott Smith:Coast to Coast
posted by personallog! @ 5:06 pm   1 comments
Sunday, August 07, 2005
Sexual gymnast!!!!

Whoo! I am human! What a woman!

I am knackered now!!!!!!! Hung over and really happy! Good job we didnt go out to drink as I would have ended up with a tatoo! It was that good a night!

Drank too much!
Smoked too much!
So cant wait till next time....too much!

I am so going to pay for it!

Very very very very very very very very very happy! Human!


Todays tune:Gary Newman-My Jesus
posted by personallog! @ 1:19 pm   4 comments
Saturday, August 06, 2005
goth up'ed ' Dave no 1!

I quiet like this shot! Its rather worring tho! Hmmm! your views please!
posted by personallog! @ 10:55 pm   4 comments
Calm before a goth storm
Its going to be 8 tonight when I see again! She has makeup at the ready!
Got to get some cleaning done but cant leav the pc! Lh has passed me access to as a great track:

Do Me Bad Things- Time for Deliverance......

OMG What a tune! Bought the album from straight away!
Listen to the full tune on:

You have to register to get access...but it doesnt cost anything! Just spam I think but worth it for the track alone! Lots of alternative tunes there!

I excited about tonight, what does she see in me....I am looking to be a mate to her so no pressure there! I have the boys coming down this moring so that may calm me down! They are goiung for a boys holiday this weekend and wanted to drop in before they go! Downside of living close to an airport! It will be good to see them!

My right arm has a ms pain in it today so maybe hard to walk with stick but I am going to do it!

I will not be updating again untill monday as planing on getting drunk tonight with Jen! Pictures will be coming!
See you on the other side
posted by personallog! @ 8:17 am   0 comments
Friday, August 05, 2005
All in the name of gothing up a flat!Just spent £15:00 on candles! What do they do? They smell! Made my pasty taste funny as well! You never want to taste a Vanilla sausage roll ever! Meat and vanilla dont mix!!!

Got my order for food/beer coming this evening! Delivery from supermarket done on line!
Oh and back from work early as legs just went away from me! Pain is really bad, might need to get some pain killers soon! Hope I am going to be ok for tomorrow! Just going to relax from now till 8 pm tomorrow! Asked to leave early today from work as feet feel like there on fire! Cleaning the flat will be done in the morning....well after luch...when I can! Need more music:

Leftfield-Swords (the base line on this track rules!)
Les Rythames Digitales - Jaques your body (used in a commercial for a car I think!)
Mekon- Welcome to tackel town (bring on the weekend! I want to shake my ass!Wooo!)
Propellerheads- Comintogetya(oooooooo! what a tune!)

Has anyone tryed that Swank Diet? Tempted but...I dont think I could start a diet called a S from....yeah you know what I mean!

Hope your all ok

P.s Dont ever do your food shopping on line when your will end up with beer, chips, dips and breakfast food...not a good way to start the week!LOL!
posted by personallog! @ 11:37 am   4 comments
Thursday, August 04, 2005
A Good Day for me!!
Hello all,

I think I am getting famouse...Well its been spotted by a doctor on the us side...err have to stop mentioning the weed!

Well he has passed me a link to explane...please read and pass round to any ms'ers out there! We need somone to take note of what we are going through...and the best people to listen to are the doc's! Judge for yourself and let me know what you think...please!

Link to what I have been sent!

Back on with the's sineads birthday(and I wont tell you how old!) today...maybe she will leave a note to say thanks! No she isnt brave enough! Happy Birthday...

I have seen a good way to view life today. I was walking back from work and saw an old guy(75-80 years old) with a stick...he was walking faster than me. He just got out of sight so I tried to keep up. He passed a traffic crossing...he pressed the button for the lights and walked on, not over the crossing but down the path(sidewalk!) and I could see him smiling as he looked round to check I wasnt looking. He looked like a naughty child! Lol good lad! Live a little, you never too old to have fun...or to ill! 1 more day till the most beutiful girl in the world is staying over for a drink....(yes she now has the web address for this blog!xxxx)
Be nice on the makeup front babe(picture will be here after the weekend!)

Roll on the weekend!Hope everyone is having a good 'n'!
posted by personallog! @ 3:06 pm   1 comments
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
You want comedy
Just give a pissed off ms'er all his dirty washing and tell them to hand wash them .....
he may not be pissed for doing it its just when he tries sitting on the spinner to dry them and falls over! Fecking hilarious!

Need to move house and get a flat with the pluming for a washer!

posted by personallog! @ 4:20 pm   1 comments
Found my 'angry teenager' in me!!!!
Nirvana: Lithium

Tune of the day! Sorry bit angry at Harry Potter! Well not Harry as such! More like the over 30's reading the books while sitting in the disabled seat! They wont move if reading! Even when you stand over them with whibbley legs and a stick! I am too polite to ask people to move....well this was this morning on the way to work! On the way back from work I just looked too hard(tall too!) The poor girl nearly sh*t herself! I said thankyou when she got up!(see!) It messed up my day tho! Every call an angry customer,every issue they raised was somthing they could do themselves!

God why give anyone else ms! I have had enough of it, you can take it back....please! Allright you give with one hand(life and everything!) and I feel your taking the piss giving a 29 year old this!

Thats when teenager in me came out! I am f*cking angry! I have done some bad things in life but....they dont desserve ms do they?


Sorry! Got to change society! I am a Man for F*ck Sake! Let me be one! Let me be the best that I can be! Let me have the chair on the tram before I get too angry!

(Jen has no credit on her phone and hasnt text me this morning! may explaine this update!)

Nirvana:Come as you are!

I need to shout out as really cant stand this feeling like a second class/hand citezen!

And then Jack rang....what a star! cheered me up no end with the irish twang! god bless ya cotton socks! ta be sure ta be sure! Havent got a chess board yet! I have to start looking soon!

Cheers Jack!

Hope everyone else has there own Jack!
posted by personallog! @ 2:37 pm   0 comments
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
Sick day amondo!
Think I am paying for last weekend, Sleep pattern if it wasnt allready!
I have a hunger to feed and I dont think its going away soon. Good thing that came out of the weekend tho. I now have tickets to see Paul Weller and Joss stone!

Rock! Should be two great gigs! Looking forward to them! But have to concentrate on getting back to work! I need to be back so I can pay for these things! Will have to sort out a good stick for them! I think I will ask Jen to help me choose...not to goth babe! No skulls on the top!

Jen is coming to stay soon! 4 Days and counting! Cant wait!(goth name for Jen is angelic scars! just found out from msn!)Reporting in even when sick!

Hope your all ok!
posted by personallog! @ 8:59 am   4 comments
Monday, August 01, 2005
Paul Mckenna!
On Sky One next week Paul takes on the challenge of 'ms'! Next week a Ms sufferer as chanllenged him to.....well what I said three weeks ago! I want somone to record it for me!
The power of PMS maybe to the rescue!
I will give full report next week!

It could be great! I will let you know!

Pot report:
posted by personallog! @ 8:58 pm   0 comments
Now its time to pick up the pieces!
Friday night.... drunk!
Monday.......hmm dave time to pick the pieces!

Cleaning the flat as well as finding a cure for furry tongue! So far 3 pints of water seems to help! I have rung in sick to work! Got an email from Sinead....How you doing babe? Dont worry about leaving a note here! You only have the rest of the world to read anything you leave me! Hope life is dealing you a good hand!

1st thing this morning I got a text from Jen! Happy sick day! I cant wait till saturday, Hope I can clean the flat in time! Have 6 days to goth up the flat! Any idea's anyone? Dark and covered in candles I think!(mental note to get insurance for flat!)

Sineads birthday on thursday! Happy birthday mate!

Hope life is going ok for all!

Tune for the day:Nitin Sawhney:Tides
posted by personallog! @ 10:35 am   4 comments
ms....not just a diary
About Me

Name: personallog!
Home: St. Annes, Lancashire, United Kingdom
About Me:
I am 6ft 3" skinny and not well. I was diagnosed with ms in 2004 and I would like to speak with others who have ms. I have a want to raise money for ms charities. We have to find a cure for this hell!!!! See my complete profile

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